The Fun Scale

I have been very busy these days. Luckily, I have been busy with FUN rather than WORK (though, nonstop working will return once more in September...hooray). Let's start with the Fourth of July. I was really sad to be missing the Fourth in Minocqua, even though I usually work on the Fourth anyway...usually the double shift. HOWEVER, celebrating my nation's freedom in Korea was actually absolutely delightful. Fellow teachers and I had a barbecue on the top of our apartment building. While it is rather dirty up there, the view of urban Incheon surrounded by pretty, pretty mountains compensated for the general dirt and grime. What did NOT compensate for the filth was the scorching hot sun. Fortunately, we battled the heat by running to Homeplus and purchasing a decent number of water guns. Water gun battles ensued...over and over again. I fell three times. Fell hard. Once flat on my back. Wasn't sore in the morning though because I am a beast. After we ran out of water and realized how much extra spirits we had left over, the water gun fight turned into a booze gun fight, with each gun featuring a different spirit. It was disgusting. It was fun. Bam! Beer in yo face! Bam! Soju attack! Bam! Taken down by Makali (a white rice wine)! However, one fierce warrior took it a step too far when he decided to incorporate red wine into the battle. Game over. We ended the evening by shooting some fireworks off and NOT getting arrested or even approached by the police. It was all safe fun. All in all, although I was away from my beloved USA, it was a great Fourth of July celebration. God bless America.

On the other end of the fun scale is my infected cut. One Saturday evening, as my friends and I were departing Seoul, I fell into a ditch while attempting to enter a cab. NOT SO MUCH MY FAULT. The cab driver parked next to this scary, deep, wide, dirty ditch, because Koreans can't drive or even park properly. If you read this and think, "oh goodness gracious, what a stereotype!", then you have obviously never lived in Asia...or on the U of I campus. ANYWAY, I fell into the ditch and cut my leg. I knew it wasn't good, but since Donna Tolish trained me to never seek medical attention, I figured that I would survive. A week and a half later, it was looking nasty, so I first checked with the ICEV nurse. She gave me a look of disgust and insisted that I go to the hospital that very day. I went the next day and was officially told that it was an infection and was then given an injection in the a** and some antibiotics. I just pray that it is healed by.......

MUD FESTIVAL!!!!! Mud festival is next weekend. It is exactly what it sounds like and I might pass out with excitement when I get there. And I WIL be there, infected wound or not.

Now that the fun scale is now back on track, I will let you know that THAILAND is also in my near future. September 19-26 will be a week of beautiful beaches, hopefully lots of coconut rum, swimming, delicious food, lady boys, and screaming at children not because they are talking when teacher is talking but because their sand castle got in the way of my rum soaked stumble into the sea.

Last note- Sylvester and Fluffy are somehow still alive.

This is What Has Been Happening To Me...

Here is what has happened since the last time I blogged....

-I finished teaching Saturday classes (for now) and therefore am VERY, VERY happy. If I ever have to teach another internet class from my home at 9:00 on a Friday night again, I will dunk my head into a bucket of acid. You want to know how I coped with that abysmal situation? I drank wine during every session and rarely wore a bra. That made me a little more happy and a little more comfortable.

-My family came to Korea for a visit. T-Bone, the Wyotch, Rachie, Gay-Gay, and EC accomplished quite a lot and, although Rachel would perhaps disagree, we covered a vast amount of sightseeing spots. It was lovely to have them here. Although, Gay-Gay and I were rather tired by the end of it so we started to make our own fun while being melted by the Korean sun at some palace. More to come on that in the future. Highlights of the trip include some beautiful sights at Jeju Island, the most insane bus ride I ever have or ever shall experience, watching the World Cup in Itaewon, and, of course, watching August Rush in our hotel room (it's a beautiful film).

-I have started teaching English to Kindergartners once a week. They are obnoxiously cute and it shouldn't be too difficult for me to smuggle one into my bag and take it home. They are small and my bag is big.

- Work is actually going down the sh***er. Upper management is just awful. Money hungry. Absolutely not in touch with what it is like to actually teach at ICEV. Thank god that I really like my fellow teachers and also sometimes really enjoy the children.

- I bought two fish. Their names are Fluffy and Sylvester. They are the most boring fish I've ever met. I'm thinking of flushing them not because they are dead or dying but because neither of them possesses a personality.


And that is what has been going on in this segment of my adventures.

Working Hard for the (wine) Money

Today is my first day off after a thirteen day work period. I normally just work Saturdays, teaching for the Saturday program, but we had an overnight last weekend which meant that I had to work on Sunday as well. By day seven, I began to loose my voice and the remaining week of teaching was somewhat challenging. I felt like Ariel in The Little Mermaid when her voice was taken by the sea witch...only the sea witch was ICEV and rather than receiving a new pair of legs, I received overtime pay...which will go towards the purchase of lots and lots of wine (as it always does).

Although working thirteen days straight is not super fun, I enjoyed the overnight. I went on my first field trip (as a teacher, not as a human)! We went to a little amusement park called Aiins World, where they have models of famous landmarks from around the world. I chaperoned my grammar class, which is comprised of a very lovely group of little Koreans. After the field trip, we went back to ICEV, where we had some activities and held class. However, the kids were a little too pumped up to have a full lesson, so we took a quiz, quickly discussed adjectives and then proceeded to the gym, where they played dodge ball. Watching a bunch of children hurl balls at one another makes for more fun than a 80 minute grammar lesson.

ANYWHO, here are some pictures from the overnight. These are the same kids that I have been teaching every Saturday for the past 8 weeks. I have them for three more weeks. While I am excited that I will not have to work the next weekend program, it has been nice having the same students consistently (versus the main program, where it's a new group every week). Still, as much as I like these kids, I WANT MY WEEKENDS BACK! BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also, I apologize for referencing such a lame song in the title of this blog. It's all I've got right now.

Students of the Past and Present

Soooooo, today was a little rough at work. Just a little. My Shakespeare boys were naughty, I had to give THREE red stamps (which are like the Scarlet Letter of ICEV), and my students' English level is super low. The concept of choosing an English name was waaaayyyy over their heads. I had to name many of them. Mostly because the boys were picking names like :"Julie" and "Judy" and the girls were choosing names like "Chris". Although, RC Robo was able to name himself. Clever kid.

ANYWAY, although this week might be rough, when I arrived home tonight, I came across some letters that past students have written me. They are too adorable to not share. Here are two of my favorites....

This one is from Sally;
"Dear <3 <3 ET Teacher" (that is what the students call me)
"Hello. ET Teacher I am Sally. How are you. I am very happy. I Love you ET Teacher. I like ET Teacher...I'm very thanks for you. <3 <3 <3
Bye Bye.
ET Teacher...
from: Sally

This one is from Clara;
"Hello! Elisa teacher. I'm your student, Clara. I'm very thank you for you. <3 Because you was teached us for 1 week. <3 So I'm very thank you for you. <3 I think I was greedy for you. So also I'm very sorry for you! But I can't forget you! Because you're my teacher. I think you're greatest teacher in ICEV <3. I hope you will get gold medal for teacher! Thank you!! teacher! I can't forget you!
-Clara-

Well, Clara, I didn't win a gold medal but I DID win teacher of the week that week (I can now check that off of my list of goals!) AND a 10,000 won gift certificate to the cinema! So thanks for your support, dearest Clara!

I do not see teacher of the week in my future for this week...these kids give me a bad feeling. I feel many red stamps and am warming up my vocal chords for when I have to pull out the "teacher voice". However, while not every week will be golden, I will keep in mind that for all the bad students I encounter, I encounter about five times as many Sally and Claras.

The Point System

I've decided to keep Korea and Elise on a point system. Whichever party has the most points when I leave wins.

Korea + 1 point for having buttons on the tables at restaurants.

Korea -3 points for squatters/public toilets where you have to squat.

Korea +2 for your barbecue, where you wrap your delicious meat, garlic, and whatever condiments you so choose in lettuce.

Elise +1 for being the most polite person on the subway.

Elise -1 point for one time accidentally sitting in the area reserved for the elderly, handicapped, and pregnant.

Korea -2 points for producing a Korean version of the musical Legally Blonde...it just doesn't translate.

Elise +2 points for your dedicated support of Korean street food.

Korea +3 points for providing Korean street food.

Elise -1 point for Elise's stomach, who has already often suffered from indulging in too much Korean street food.



Current score: Korea 1, Elise 1

This Post is Dedicated to My Father

There are several adventures/experiences/opinions that are on my blogger agenda. However, all comes second to this hot topic, which I felt needed immediate blogging attention.

I doubt that this topic is exclusive to Korea. I'm sure you could come across a similar situation in the states, perhaps at the Costco or Sam's Club. Regardless, it is a situation that I felt was worth discussing.

I bought what I thought was a pack of butter from the grocery store. The packaging led me to believe that there were, of course, four sticks of butter enclosed. "Oh, how well stocked I shall be for topping popcorn and sauteing vegetables," thought I.

What I received, rather than my four normal sticks of butter, was one ENORMOUS BUTTER STICK. I named him GIGANTOR. He will be delicious.

My father will be dying of envy when he reads this.

Don't worry Pops, I FedExed you your own GIGANTOR earlier this day.

The Good and the Bad of Korea (Part 1)

Good :)

Nanta- I went to the theater this past Sunday evening and saw a truly wonderful and entertaining show, Nanta (which mean's "Cookin'" in English). It is extremely famous and popular in Korea. It is one of those shows in which the actors play music using everyday objects as instruments, like Stomp. In this case, knives, pots, pans, and things of the sort are used. However, in the end, they use regular drumming instruments and just go to town. The whole show was one of the most fun experiences I've ever had in a theater. ALSO, I was dragged onstage (they target foreigners). The audience was split into two teams and I was brought up to cook for my side, the blue team. I, of course, WON. Duh.

Pagers- In many restaurants and bars in Korea, there is a button you press to page your server. It's perfect. In one bar, they even have a buzzer at each seat so that the server knows exactly who to go to. So, you never have to be thirsty. Ever. The Thirsty Whale needs to get in on this idea quickly.

Recycling- The Koreans are very adamant about separating the trash and recycling. In fact, I was walking around a shopping area in Seoul, eating some ice cream, and I decided that I was finished with the ice cream. I went to the entrance of a store, where I saw a trash can. Before I could place my trash in the can, an employee came out of nowhere, took my ice cream and walked away. At first, I was certain that she was suffering from ice cream envy and taking my sweet treat to the employee lounge to finish it off. However, a friend informed me that I was about to place my food trash in a non-food garbage can. There is also a recycling center outside my apartment, where there is usually an old man on duty to make sure that everyone recycles properly. Good for Korea.

Street Food- I've mentioned street food in other posts but I just need to reiterate how much I love the culinary street fare, especially on a night out. Deep fried squid, deep fried sweet potatoes, stuff on sticks, rice noodles in spicy sauce, wraps filled with goodness, blah, blah, blah. Half the time, I don't even know what I am shoving down my gullet, but I always enjoy it. And for only 1,000 or 2,000 won (1 or 2 bucks)!

Eat, DRINK, and be Merry- Along with the endless sea of food available on the street, it is legal to drink on the street. It's like being in Key West, only you aren't on vacation. You are just living your life. Your booze soaked life. God Bless Korea.

Saving Energy- If you drive around Seoul or Incheon, the desire to save energy is not very easy to see. It is a very industrialized area. HOWEVER, in almost all buildings, heat is not used throughout. For example, the hallways of my school are not heated. Yes, this makes for a cold walk from class to class, but it is a mild moment of inconvenience that saves money on the heating bills and, more importantly, energy. Also, Koreans do not use dryers. They line dry their clothing. What patient people.

Bad :(

Saving Energy- I don't have a dryer! I need that pair of underpants NOW!

Female Attire- Korean women, especially around my age and perhaps a little younger dress up and/or wear super trendy clothing ALL THE TIME. At first, I found this to be a good thing and was really into their fashion sense. Now that I realize how much time they into their appearance, it has become tiresome. They also (and I am barely generalizing at this point) wear high heels in all situations OR they wear some type of platform shoe. Many also dress overly feminine. Lots of bows. Lots of frills. And the SKIRTS. The SKIRTS and SHORTS are what get me. There can be a blizzard destroying the streets of Seoul, and a large percentage of the young women will still have their asses hanging out of their skirts or shorts. I can't go on, I have too much to write on this topic. Next time you see me, just ask me about it.

Pushing- Koreans are pushers. Especially the little old ladies. Ooooooh, they are aggressive.

Crowds- Korea is crowded. Very crowded. Combine the crowds with the pushing and things can get very hairy.